Hold On

I got home just past midnight tonight after having a crappy, crappy day. Hungry and tired, and totally fried, working a temp job.

And yet, I don't want to complain, because at least I've got my basic faculties about me. Jody on the other hand is, as expected, in the middle of her fog. Barely able to utter words, barely able to move. She seems completely wiped. I asked her how she felt, and she grogged out the word "steamrolled". Which was exactly how I felt.

The two of us, totally spent, totally wiped out, reminded me of a day back in December, which I never wrote about; so flashback with me for a moment.

This was early, early December, before we'd even started this blog. It was within the first week after we got the news that we were going to go through this awful wringer again. It was some Saturday morning around here, probably December 10, both of us having put on brave faces for each other since we got the news, but underneath it all very tense and fatigued and anxious about the future and terrified of what might lie ahead. I think we didn't realize it at the time, but we were both completely bottled up.

So we're doing our usual Saturday thing of laundry and cleaning up the apartment, and I put on some music to keep us going and to lighten the mood. Just ran my iPod through the stereo and picked a playlist and didn't think about it. And a moment later, a song came on which just unleashed the gates for me and Jody both. We found each other in the middle of the apartment, burst into tears, and clung to each other for dear life; we rocked quietly all the way through the song and released 5 hellish days of pent-up frustration and anguish and let each other see, for the first time, how affected we were by the news that we'd gotten.

And when it was over, I think we both felt a ton better: by being honest with each other about our fears and acknowledging our own frailty, we were able to move on and gird ourselves for battle again. I'm not sure, but I think the idea of this blog came out of that day.

The song? you ask.

The song was Everybody Hurts by REM. But it wasn't REM's version; it was the Unplugged version sung by The Corrs.

You may know this song, and if you do, you're probably familiar with the original, which had Michael Stipe wailing for all get out. And that's a great version of the song—I won't take anything away from that piece of music. But the cover version done by Ireland's most famous band (after U2, and the maybe the Chieftains) is haunting and melancholy, and will turn you inside out. It features the heartbreaking vocals of Andrea Corr and the lush violin stylings of her sister Sharon.

So if you're ever in need of a good cry; if you need a little comfort; if, as the song says, "you feel like letting go", then you should tune in to this masterpiece. Tonight, when I got home and saw that Jody and I were both at the ends of our respective ropes, I plugged in the headphones and got lost. And doing so helped me to see the other side again.

And here's the deal. This will absolutely be a copyright infringement, but I'm going to hope that the powers that be interpret this post in the spirit it was intended, which is to heal; and I'm going to provide a link to this exquisite song. It's way downsized to make it manageable. If you like it, I suggest you buy the album (it's a great album, I highly recommend it). In any case, please keep this sound clip to yourself and don't go duping it and sending it to people, 'cause that's not what this is for.

We're going to get through this thing....just gotta hold on.

And remember: you're not alone.

Click here to listen to the clip.

Everybody Hurts, ©1993 by REM, sung by The Corrs

When your day is long
And the night
The night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough of this life
Well hang on

Don't let yourself go
Cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts
Sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along

When your day is night alone
- Hold on, hold on -
If you feel like letting go
- Hold on -
If you're sure you've had too much of this life
Hang on

Cause everybody hurts, sometimes
Take comfort in your friends
And everybody hurts

Don't blow your head
Oh, no
Don't blow your head
If you feel like you're alone
No, no, no, you're not alone

If you're on your own
In this life
And the days and nights are long
If you're sure you've had too much
Of this life
To hang on

Well, everybody hurts
Sometimes, everybody cries
Sometimes, everybody hurts
Sometimes

And everybody hurts
Sometimes

So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
- Cause no you are not alone -