Memo to Bravo (or Lifetime)

I went once more unto the bra-shopping breach yesterday and managed to stump yet another professional fitter.

And that got me thinking . . . maybe there's a reality show in here somewhere?

Like Top Chef or Project Runway, we could start with a dozen or so professional fitters and eliminate one by one until we crowned the Wizard of Bras! (OK, I'm stealing that name from an actual company, but I bet they'd go along for the right price. Or better yet, they could be a sponsor!)

I think this idea might really have legs (or, well, a more appropriate body part).

We could start each episode with a short contest (inspired by the "quickfires" on Top Chef) in which the fitters have to guess the bra sizes of a random group of women, each wearing the same outfit.

Then we could move on to the main challenge, with each contestant paired with a hard-to-fit "model" (aka real woman) who needs a great-fitting bra with some specific characteristic: makes her look bigger, makes her look smaller, evens her out, gives her more support, etc.

Instead of the Top Chef pantry or the Macy's accessory wall, the fitters would have a huge stock room filled with every conceivable size and style of bra—all supplied for free by designers and manufacturers who hope to, um, boost sales.

We could save the hardest challenges for the later rounds: strapless! backless! sports bra!

Of course, the final challenge would be to fit me.

(Cue evil laughter.)